We can all agree that apartment sharing in adulthood is most likely the necessary uncomfortable solution that keeps you away from somebody’s couch or, even worse, homelessness.
If you have never had a need for apartment sharing and have never been in any of the aforementioned alternatives, I say a hearty congratulations to you.
If, like me, you have had to share personal space with (most likely unlikeable/unfriendly) strangers, I wish you strength and good luck.
Life throws curveballs more often than we care to acknowledge. We just adjust and align with our new realities, often without even noticing how significant the transitional phase is until we have arrived at the other side.
If you absolutely cannot avoid this phase, the best you can do for yourself is to keep the apartment sharing situation as short-term as possible.
Here, I share the hard facts that I had to learn and the ways I managed one of the most uncomfortable experiences I ever lived in. If your situation calls for apartment sharing, this article might help you ease into your new (shared) space.
The Master Bedroom Is Worth The Extra Cost:
If you are considering apartment sharing, get the bedroom with access to your own private bathroom, if possible. You will most definitely appreciate the investment on days when you really need some semblance of privacy.
Having your own personal bathroom also allows you to return to and enjoy this sacred space just like you left it (hopefully sparkling clean).
Your Roommates Are Just That:
Except you find yourself in a really good apartment sharing situation, it is best to establish reasonable boundaries in shared space and respect the reasonable boundaries set by your roommate(s).
Recognize that tolerance is not fondness. Keep conversations brief, polite, and impersonal except you have a relationship that extends further than just sharing common space. You will most likely find that this saves you a lot of headache as time passes.
Expecting Less Will Keep You Comfortable While Apartment Sharing:
Just because you are one to clean up after yourself and treat your belongings and space with respect doesn’t mean others have similar inclinations. When apartment sharing, you have to be open to the high possibility of differences in personalities, orientations, and lifestyles.
I frequently experienced loud phone conversations at night and midnight, someone who was seldom at home when it’s their turn to take the trash out, and undesirable smells from what must have been failed attempts at cooking as I had found substances that look like food dumped in the kitchen trash shortly after many of such experiments.
As for being courteous, expect days when even the friendly roommate will struggle to respond to your greeting. Considering the fact that we all have days when we’d rather be left alone, be kind enough to understand and readily forgive such moments.
Be Expressive, Gently:
As mentioned earlier, it is uncommon for two people to be exactly the same. When apartment sharing, the possibility of one or more persons ignoring their obligations/assigned chores exists.
Annoying as it may be, it is generally helpful to overlook the negligence once or twice, depending on your patience level. If you find that it is intentional and/or consecutively reoccurring, gently and logically expressing your disappointment might be well received by a reasonable roommate. This is the better case scenario.
In worse cases, the lazy/negligent roommate acts aloof and uncooperative. If you have a decent landlord, it might be time to discuss your dissatisfaction(s) with him/her. This approach might seem immature, but it may be the best way to resolve issues that come with apartment sharing.
The Goal Is To Grow And Get Out, Focus:
As often as you are able to earn, save a percentage towards getting your own space. Apartment sharing often comes with its fair share of drama and mostly unfortunate surprises. The stress that occurs as a result of apartment sharing can be emotionally band/or mentally daunting.
Most who have had to, unfortunately, endure apartment sharing, will agree that it is better to own one’s little/ordinary personal space than share a luxury apartment with a difficult roommate.
Long story short, for the sake of your sanity and overall health, save up as fast as you can to be able to afford to rent or buy your own space that will feel like home.
Leave On A Good Note:
When you have saved enough, found a suitable place for yourself, and it is time to move, do it with respect. Regardless of your relationship with the landlord and your roommates, make sure that you do not leave a mess when you leave.
This would seem like a no-brainer to most of us. Unfortunately, there are people who hold a grudge and think their experiences justify leaving the shared space messy to prove a point. The only point they are able to prove with such action is that they are vengeful and dirty.
Here’s to wishing you the grace to heal from the trauma that often comes with apartment sharing and to blossoming in your own space 
With love, Phoenix.
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