Modern dating has taken its own form. People of different generations can agree that even though the world has become a global village with the availability of social media platforms and an endless list of dating platforms, finding the right person seems to be more complicated than ever before. It is as though the more options we have, the more spoiled for choice we are.

As if that weren’t enough, these abundance of options tease some who should be working to keep their functional relationship with their partner out to see what’s happening in the greener pasture on the other side of the road. This leads to even more single people looking through the murky waters of the modern dating pool.

Here are some tips to make your dating experience airier and give you a chance at success.

 

Be Upfront About What You Want: 

You can meet your dating companions through various channels. While dating in general has changed drastically, many still meet through mutual contacts. It is beneficial to be upfront with your general preferences in life so that friends and acquaintances have an idea of who you are, what you stand for, and your expectations of yourself and others. This helps inform them if they choose to play matchmaker or if they choose to present you with other opportunities.

Regardless of whether you meet through a mutual contact or online, create some time for a phone call before proposing or agreeing to a date as you are the only ones who know what you truly want in a partner. You will most likely learn more about someone on a 30 minute phone call than in a full week of texting with them. This lets you confirm if you have a good chance beyond physical attraction and helps you screen potential dates for your deal breakers.

If you believe you’re a good match, plan and agree to an interesting date that’s peculiar to both of your interests and have fun. If you find that you’re not a good fit, let them down gently. Avoid leading the other person on. No matter what, do not be rude. Just because you’re not a good fit for dating does not mean they can’t add value in other areas or vice versa.

Be Considerate Of Their Time:

Time holds so much value. In being considerate of another’s time, you show how much value you place on your own time. Yes, it is acceptable to be fashionably late on certain occasions, just don’t overdo it. When preparing for your date, pick out a few options of clothing ahead of the day just like you would for a job interview as this might be the most relevant job interview of your life. 

If a need to cancel arises, inform the other person immediately. Share some details of why you have to cancel with your love interest so they know you didn’t just cancel on them for an insubstantial reason. This also helps you get the date rescheduled easily.

Keep Your Conversations (mostly) Positive:

On a phone call or in person, try to keep your conversations airy and likely flirty. This is especially important when you are just in the beginning stages of dating. Stick to honest stories that generate positive emotions as this will likely help you stay interesting to the other person and get them looking forward to the next conversation with you.

Depending on your personality and the energetic feedback you receive from the other person, you can choose to be vulnerable with more sensitive information as your dating relationship advances. Meanwhile, remember to be polite to everyone around you; especially service people.

Focus On Getting to Know About Each Other:

Most of us go on initial dates with the intention of getting to know the other person better so as to make an informed decision on whether to move forward with them or not. Sometimes, we get excited and share too much about ourselves while neglecting to prioritize getting to know the other person. Pace yourself, show interest in your dating companion by asking them questions you need to learn about them.

The eyes are the windows to the soul. Making eye contact is a confident person’s move, it also gives you an insight to what the other person isn’t saying. Maintain eye contact with your date when discussing issues that matter to you to ensure the message is being accepted well.  

More people make the mistake of mentioning a past relationship on the first few dates than you can imagine. Don’t be one of those people. Let the conversations be about you, your date, and whoever or whatever is positively important to you both enough to be brought up in discussions on the first few dates. 

Leave as much personal space between you two as possible until a connection is established. Pay attention to cues and body language. While your love language might be physical touch, they might not be ready for your hand reaching for theirs from across the table. This doesn’t mean they do not fancy you, they might still be trying to decide on whether to move forward with or without you. 

Bear in mind that we arrive at these decisions at different paces. Don’t force anything, just enjoy your date and go with the flow.

Eat What You Want (in moderation):

Remember you’re on a date to get to know each other. Don’t pretend to be satisfied with four bites from your bowl of salad when you actually need a bowl of salad and a hamburger to get near being satisfied. While it is not advisable to feast like a glutton on a date or even in general, you should order the meal you want and enjoy it reasonably. 

Express Gratitude To Whoever Is Hosting Or Paying For The Date:

Paying on dates shouldn’t be viewed as anyone’s obligation, it should be appreciated as a sign of good dating etiquette. Nowadays, there are divides across groups who believe a particular sex should always pay, the host(ess) or initiator should always pay, and those who think everyone should pay for themselves. While some of us do not have an opinion on who is right or wrong, it’s only good manners to express gratitude if someone pays your way.

Stay Open To Dating Others Until You Commit To Each Other:

“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.”. Ever heard of that? Having a fantastic time in each other’s company on a few first dates doesn’t readily translate to happily ever after. Don’t assume there is a relationship brewing. Talk about it. Make sure you and your dating companion are on the same page and committed to each other before cutting off others who might be more interested in you.

When you have both agreed to be committed to each other, be kind in letting the others know that you are no longer available to date. You might be able to establish other kinds of friendships with them in doing so.

Hopefully, these dating etiquettes will help guide your dating life to success.

Here’s to wishing you fantastic and successful dating experiences

With love, Phoenix. 

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